Bhad game, bhad!
Well first of all, the hittest function was simply aweful (I couldn't go anywhere NEAR an enemy without dieing). Second, I would suggest drawing your own characters rather than using pre-made graphics off of a sprite website. And last of all, the game was pretty much a poorly scripted, lackluster sprite game. Overall, this game is a lame excuse for not being able to draw. Better luck next time.
By the way, you got a 5 in humor because it was so bad that it actually gave me a nice chuckle. Apparently you've got some talent as a comedian!